WARDROBE IRONER – a cylindrical steamer placed in the bottom corner of your wardrobe with the spout in the middle facing up. Leave on for 5 minutes – any longer & they’ll fit your Barbie doll.
MAGNETIC CAR ICE SCRAPE – 2 large aquarium algae cleaners. Stored in the top right of the windowscreen. It clears inside & outside at the same time, from the inside.
EGG DISH COOKER – get a small round Teflon baking tin put 1 capful of cooking oil in. Put it in the frying pan. Hence everything finishes cooking at the same time.
BIN BAG HOLDER – use a normal linen basket. Especially useful for large industrial jobs.
MAP LAMINATION WITH BLACK CHINA GRAPH – cut an A4 size portion of a map & laminate it. Get a black china graph from the craft shop. Mark out your route. Wipe it off when the journeys complete.
SURVIVAL BALACLAVA – Sew a vacuum cleaner hose to the mouthpiece of the balaclava. The hose goes to the bottom of your bed & keeps the whole body warm.
BED CLIPS – get the posh dog clips & sew them onto the 4 edges of your duvet nearest to your drawer divan handles & clip them on. This stops your duvet from coming off during the night.
LAPTOP DUST PREVENTER/SCREEN CHILL OUT – get a pillow case & cut it just below the screen
it sandwiches between the screen & keyboard. Cut out holes for catches etc.
PLUNGER TUBE – for outside tables when you don’t want ash etc. blowing everywhere. Get the biggest diameter white plumbers tube to fit through the parasol hole & place a crockery pot on the floor.
THERMOS COASTER – get a 25 C.D. plastic holder. Place ice cubes in it & keep it upside down.
This keeps bottles cans or glasses cool.
SALT CELLAR MATE – use matches or the black & white pieces from the mastermind game to block up the hole in your salt cellar. This stops the salt from getting damp & keeps the hole free of damp salt.
KARFRIEND – use a collapsible crate from the D.I.Y. shop. Put foam in the base & place large plumbing tubes inside. The seatbelt wraps around it & clips into place. Ideal for flasks mugs cans etc.
HIDDEN CAMERA IN SPEAKERS – Put your lens in the tweeter part of the speaker. A discreet way of capturing burglars
DYED WALLPAPER PASTE – Use fabric dye or paint powder etc. for dying wallpaper paste, so that you can see where you’ve pasted.
15 INSECT CAPTURE CONE – get 2 large pieces of card. Form a cone with a 1 inch hole at one end & a 15 inch hole at the other end. Staple @ both ends. Put tape along the join. Spray moths etc. through the small end.
16 SPOUT BANDAGE – place an adhesive bandage just below the spout of your kettle or tea pot. This can be used several times (as it dehydrates) to stop drips.
17 PERSONAL HI FI DAMAGE PREVENTER – by wrapping the headphone lead once around the belt clip you prevent accidentally dropping it onto the floor & this stops the jack from coming out constantly.
18 CORN COB HOLDER – using a small long baking tin you not only keep the sweet corn cob warm but it can hold lots of luscious butter at the table.
19 SAFETY ESCAPE (COLLAPSABLE TRAMPOLINE) – Place a large wooden framed box underneath high rise buildings below the windows. Nail or staple or glue a bed sheet onto it.
20 CHOPPING BOARD CLEAN ME CLIP – for when you’re busy. When you’ve used the chopping board clip a big paper clip onto the board with a label saying ‘CLEAN ME’. Because it’s hard to tell if it’s dirty.
21 HYGENIC BODY DRYER – use the industrial hand dryers facing down & about a foot up from the bathroom floor. This can be used to dry the floor too.
22 LETTER BOX ALERT – have a piece of string attached to a drawing pin with a bell at the other end.
Put the drawing pin above the letter box in the middle. This rings when mail or a burglar arrives.
23 BIN FRESH – put a little bit of washing machine fabric liquid into the bottom of bins. This keeps it smelling nice & and prevents diseases & makes it easy to clean out afterwards.
24 DUVET HEADBOARD – fold your duvet in half and place over uncomfortable and ugly headboards to have a matching bed set.
25 STATIC PILLOWS – sew your pillow cases onto the said duvet headboard so that your pillows do not move in the night.
26 GARDEN CHAIR COVER – get a small waterproof roller blind & tie strap it to the top of your garden chair. When Mr Rain comes you just clip the roller blind onto the bucket squab Using holes & screws.
27 STRINGED TEA BAG REMINDER LABLE – when you’ve got lots of people to serve. Place white sticky labels onto the tea bag string end stating how many sugars are required on each.
28 PRINTER DEADENER MAT – use an old mouse mat to put under your printer to stop the noise.
29 ICE CUBE COMB – Get 2 combs. Break off several of the teeth so that they dip in each ice cube tray section. Making sure it’s in the middle. Preventing ice cubes everywhere when putting them into a glass.
30 BREAK REMINDER BAND – So that you know who has broken off during snooker or pool, place a girl’s headband twice over the small end and run it down to the butt end. After each game exchange the band